Fast sex is like fast food; it might feel great for a few minutes as your having it, and it might be OK to have it once in a while, but too much of it is simply bad.
“Quickies,” as they are often referred to, certainly have their place in a couple’s sex life, but they should not become substitutes for the intimate, passionate, and lengthy experience of sexual intercourse that you have the potential to give to your partner.
There are three main problems that contribute to having fast sex way too often: trouble controlling your stamina in the bedroom, laziness, and selfishness. The last two reflect the most poorly on you, and they can also be an indication that you don’t like or love your partner as much as you might have thought you did. The former is the most forgivable for sure, but it should be treated like both of the others in that you should constantly work to try and overcome it, as long as you wish to remain in your current relationship.
Learning how avoid consistently having fast sex by building up your stamina in bed is difficult, but certainly possible. It can be achieved by a combination of controlling your mind (sometimes you can become too into it too quickly and, while it may feel amazing, you can be unable to stop yourself from finishing early) and manipulating the positions you have sex in; certain positions simply feel better than others – one reason is that different ones stimulate your penis more or less directly and intensely – and finding the ones which feel slightly less intense and sticking to them early on can be a great way to prolong finishing. It might take time, and it is important to try and be patient with yourself, work at it, and eventually build your stamina up to the point at which you give yourself enough time to satisfy her.
The second problem that leads to consistently fast sex is laziness.
Sometimes, the idea of having sex with a girl is simply better, and more romantic, than actually doing it.
You might be tired or not really in the mood after a while, and you might not feel like putting in the effort it might take to have an intense, lengthy sexual experience. In this case you might simply decide to cum as fast as possible. This is certainly something to avoid doing regularly, as it can eventually make her feel undesired, unappreciated, and somewhat used, and can certainly degrade the quality of your relationship with her.
Finally, another issue – somewhat related to the previous one – that can lead to regular “quickies” is selfishness. Let’s be honest, it is her that benefits from having sex for a really long time, not you. For you, short and sweet might be all you want or need. However, similar to potential laziness in the bedroom, this sort of selfishness can certainly make her unhappy with the quality of her sex life – and of course, with you as a boyfriend or husband – over time, and can have a damaging effect on your relationship.
If you do find yourself constantly wanting to get it over with once you have started intercourse, it is a good idea to ask yourself why. If you are constantly tired, you can simply talk to her about it, apologize, and try to work harder at putting more effort into it. If, however, you are not as attracted to her anymore, and/or don’t really care about making her happy, you should seriously think about why you are in this relationship at all – and of course, consider getting out of it.